"Someone's Gotta Keep Your Wide-Eyed Optimism in Check"

So, I discovered this fantastic mini-series on the SciFi channel due to my darling mother and brother. It's called "Tin Man" and it is (surprise, surprise) a slightly sci-fi-ish spin-off of the original story of "The Wizard of Oz". I'm generally picky with my canon, but this kind of made me forget it. The writing wasn't quite "Firefly" calibre, and some of the actors were occasionally off, and yeah - the FX kind of sucked. BUT I have not been so riveted by a movie in a while. Besides which, some of the shout-outs to the original movie were just HILARIOUS.

First off, their Dorothy character - DG, which stands for (you guessed it) Dorothy Gale. Raised in Kansas by Aunty Em and Uncle Henry (who she thinks are her parents, but are robot-equivalents programmed to treat her as their own and gently introduce her to life in the O.Z.), and working in a diner (wearing gingham); she unexpectedly lands in the O.Z., which is kind of a battle-zone when she arrives due to:

Azkadellia, the evil sorceress who has imprisoned the rightful Queen (Glinda, yo) and has flying monkeys that bursts from her chestal region. (I had wondered about the cool prison tats on her expansive cleavage. The logistics baffle me - where, for example, would the monkeys sleep in her breasts? I don't imagine that would be too comfortable.)

When DG arrives in the O.Z., she encounters Munchkins who look like kindergartners who are far too enthusiastic about Thanksgiving. While in possession of the Munchkins, she is tied up in a net in a tree with a man named Glitch. Glitch has a (fully operational) zipper in his head - he had half his brain removed by Azkadellia because he knew too much. He is our Scarecrow-equivalent and played by an always charming Alan Cumming. I adore that man.

Next up, we meet the Tin Man. Named Wyatt Cain, he was a Tin Man (law enforcement) who worked with people who defied Azkadellia. Naturally, Azkadellia's men went after Cain and his family - they recorded the torture of his family and himself, locked him in a tin box and made him watch it over and over for about fifteen years until DG freed him from the box. I have only to say that Cain cleans up nice and DG really ought to tap that. Like, now.

Shortly following Cain joining DG and Glitch on their journey to a Road to Central City to speak to the Mystic Man (two guesses who that is), they encounter our lion, Raw, in a Papay Orchard (Papays are man-eating beasts) where he is about to become lunch. They rescue him by DG's insistence and, in the process, fall over a cliff. They escape relatively unscathed, however.

I won't go into too much detail on the rest - wouldn't want to spoil the surprise. I have only to add that Cain/DG fic will make me a very happy woman, and Glitch is my one true love.

In any event, during my time selling German Roasted Nuts at my soon-to-be-brother-in-law's family's stand, the boring slow-time hours shall be whiled away by my jotting down an outline for a sequel to this story about the O.Z. I'm a sucker for the original books by L. Frank Baum and I want to get some mad research done by the time winter break is over so I can write one adequately. My biggest sticking point at the moment is wondering 1.) Were the silver slippers lost forever in the Deadly Desert and if not, where did they go? and 2.) How the hell did they cross the Deadly Desert in Ozma of Oz? Did they used the jeweled belt from the Gnomb King?

GAH. It's been far too long since I've read the books. Perhaps that's why minor lapses from canon didn't really bother me?

Wonderful quotes:
Azkadellia:The little bitch has gone to see the Wizard.

Cain: Much obliged for the help.
DG: You're welcome, Mr. Cain. Um, I'm DG, by the way, and this is...
Cain: I know. A headcase.
Glitch: I have a proper name, you know. And whe-when I remember it, I'll tell you.
DG: What's a headcase?
Cain: It's what the state does to re-educate criminals. They rip out their brains. Make them prisoners of their own minds. Ain't that right, convict?
Glitch: Hey. Whoa. I ain't no convict. And just in case I am, it-it-it was a bogus charge, a-a-a frame job. I'm sure of it.

DG: Um.. your ah... zipper is undone.
Glitch: Oh... didn't mean to offend. (zips his head up) Gotta be careful not to lose your marbles.

Glitch: I mean they don't call me Twinkletoes for nothing, but I cut quite a rug.
Cain: (after seeing Glitch fight the LongCoats) You're a deep well, Glitch.
Glitch: It's all about rhythm.

Glitch: You know you oughta do something about that sinister brain.
Cain: Why? Someone's gotta keep your wide-eyed optimism in check.

DG's Dad: Had that crazy nightmare last night, huh?
DG: In Technicolor.

Cain: I know what you're doing, kid... I've led men through battle myself.
DG: And, um... How am I doing?
Cain: Well, there's less hugging when I do it. But not so bad.